I seemed to have forgotten to make my “Where’s jparks?” post before leaving for Hawaii. Ooops. Well I am back from, as they say here in California, va-cay.

The rejoicing has ended. My excitement about flip flops has come to an end. Now I can’t even remember why I was so excited about getting flip flops. Maybe because they were forbidden is what made them appealing and something I HAD TO HAVE! But after nine days of wearing them, my blistered feet have had enough. Maybe this was Regan’s plan all along. Buy me cheap flip flops so my feet will hurt and I would not want to wear them. Well, if that was her plan it worked. I don’t even want to see if nice flip flops wouldn’t hurt my feet. I just want to go throw both pairs that she bought me in the ocean now. I am a broken man…

I make fun of Regan all the time for saying that she is afraid to take yoga. “The instructor tells me to bring my anus back to which it came from”, she always says. I never believed that an instructor would say something so hippieish. After today I won’t make fun of her any more for saying that. We have been taking a yoga class in the morning, and yeah I know we are insane for waking up at 6:30 am while on vacation. Yesterday’s session was fine. We were on the beach and exercising the whole time. But today we had a hippie for a teacher. He rattled on about how yoga, real yoga, had nothing to with exercise. We westerners could not grasp the concept of yoga. We had to adopt it to our way of thinking and as Madonna says, we live in a material world, and that is why we made yoga into an exercise. He then proceeded to ramble on about unions and what not throughout the whole class. With all his ramblings and preaching I didn’t get any exercise. If I wanted to listen to some hippie shit I would have joined a drum circle. All I could think while listening to him was Cartman saying, “I’ve been keeping this place free of hippies since I was five”.

It’s been a while since I’ve reviewed a book. Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve written a book report since 10th grade. This should be interesting.

When I was thinking of how to write this post I kept thinking that I need to describe the book as a mash-up of two other iconic books or movies. For some reason I have it in my head, which I must admit deviates from reality from time to time, that this is how most professional reviewers review books and movies. Now that I have that notion in my head I, of course, couldn’t write this review any other way.

The problem is what two pieces of pop culture do I pick that will fully sum up this book? You see I really liked this book. It was by far the best book I’ve read in a long, long time. I generally read books that I like the story but the writing isn’t going to make the book a classical piece of literature. Not only was Android’s Dream a clever and fast paced story, but the writing was also very good. I liked it so much that I am actually keeping the book. Normally I like to give away the books that I like so that someone else can enjoy the story too.

What are the two iconic pieces of pop culture that sum up this book? I can only think of two movies that could describe this book, it’s The Bourne Identity meets The Fifth Element.

If you don’t like either of those movies don’t let this hack of a review sway you away from reading this book. The fact that I am writing this post should contest to how much I really liked the book.

[I wrote this months ago but forgot to hit publish. Oops!]